Baby Showers: Celebrity Self-Indulgence, or an Essential Celebration of Motherhood?

Wednesday 30th of January 2013 | Category: Pregnancy News | Written by: Siobhan Thomas

What is a baby shower?

Traditionally these were celebrations of the impending (or recent) arrival of a woman's first baby. Other women would gather together and give the new mother gifts for her baby and advice on being a parent. Baby showers are much more popular in the US, and are often seen in Europe as an alternative to a religious celebration such as a Baptism. However, more and more women are choosing to have a baby shower in the UK. So like it or not, they are probably here to stay.

Of course the format of one baby shower can vary considerably to the next. However, the rise in their popularity has seen a greater emphasis on decorations, party games, and favours for the guests. But the present-giving aspect has become the main focus, meaning that for some of us it sits uncomfortably (myself included).

Who's doing it?

It's touted as an 'American' thing but the chances are, you know a British woman who has had one. Many women organise them for themselves, and others are organised by friends - either in agreement with the new mother or as a surprise.

Celebrity baby showers are often covered in the press as the likes of Victoria Beckham and Mariah Carey have opened up about their parties and the gifts that they received.

It's big business. There are hundreds of companies selling party wear, services and other 'essentials' for the occasion, and these things don't come cheaply. You only have to Google 'Baby Shower' to see the overabundance of companies all vying for a slice of your party.

What's wrong with a baby shower?

For me it follows nicely in line with the rise of the expensive hen or stag weekend. Where, for the sake of indulging one person's excitement over their impending life change, multiple people are 'invited' (obliged) to part with a not-insignificant amount of time or money at the direction of somebody else.

It surprises me that more people aren't uncomfortable with telling people that they are holding a party in order to receive gifts for their new baby. Is it not greedy? I was uncomfortable enough with the idea of having a wedding list - although at least with that I see the practicality in it.

Most showers are held whilst the woman is still pregnant, and lots of people already know the sex, and even the name of their baby - removing the question for the guests over what colour baby grow to buy. Aren't we doing everything a bit too early? Wouldn't it be nice to wait for the baby to arrive, and then to see your friends after the birth? They could hear your good news and then buy something for them - in their own time and of their own choice! Isn't it nice to leave some things to look forward to after the baby arrives?

It can't all be about presents

No, I'm sure for many people it isn't. And I accept that it is an excuse for a fun get together with friends. However I don't really see why you can't just ask them if they have time for a girly dinner before your social calendar gets overridden with baby duties. Radio 1 DJ Fearne Cotton tweeted this week that she was not keen on baby showers, opting instead for a girly afternoon tea which she dubbed a 'baby gathering' - although she hasn't divulged what the difference actually was.

Being pregnant is definitely something to celebrate, but I'm just not sure it needs to be so formally celebrated and with so many people. It's a bit like going to an engagement party with speeches, presents and cake - you wonder what will be left to do at the wedding! Why can't you just celebrate it with your other half and save your creative flair for party planning next year when you're trying to cobble together your 1 year old's first birthday cake!